I’ve literally seen thousands of ways to deal with other people’s emotional drama. However, few of them result in positive change. I’m more inclined to say that what you do, is not anywhere near as important as “why you do” – What I’m saying here is to make sure you are being authentic.
One client rang me and wanted consulting advice because they were guilty about something. They wanted to “get over it” but I reminded them that nature creates guilt for a certain reason. Maybe they’d be better to change whatever they were doing that caused them guilt.
Dealing with other people’s emotion is a great test of strength. Can you stand still in the storm. If you remain ambivalent to their emotion, you’re absolutely remaining available for communication, whereas if you react, well now you know that their emotions were actually yours.
You see, nature produces emotions from other people that reflect the emotions that are going on inside us. Someone is angry at you, well, sadly it means “you are angry at you” So, if you are reacting to their emotion, you’re it.
Not reacting to someone’s emotion can seem a little harsh because you aren’t buying into it. However, when one person is drowning, you don’t usually jump in and create two people in trouble, you get ropes, and life preservers and things to help. So, reacting means they pulled you in.
If there’s no reaction, “their stress is not your stress”. If there’s a reaction inside you, then they’ve just helped you evolve. Avoid blaming people for how you feel, better you say “thanks, I never realized what was going on inside me until now.”
More tips later.