Continuation of work and activity in the outside world

Most people embark on the work of self-improvement with the desire that results will come overnight and are focused on external change instead of internal, and in most cases advertising messages are what pull them in that direction. Many people hope to create a new self with some technique without having to face (sometimes risky and scary) certain actions in their outer life, for example, telling someone what bothers you (or maybe what you like), or come up with and implement a plan to find or open a job… Moreover, as long as such an action is considered ‘too difficult’, too unpleasant, it usually means that you do not have enough motivation to change yet or – more often – that the real inner change has not yet been achieved.

External life experience has a profound effect on our subconscious and can be a kind of test of whether we have really learned our specific life lessons.

It can be said that if we could all do this ‘in our heads’ then there would be no need to live in the material world. The blessing that we often experience through difficulties is actually that the material world uncompromisingly ‘forces’ us on the path of development through often difficult and demanding challenges that sooner or later we will no longer be able to close our eyes to.

It is up to us to decide if we will ‘pick up the game’ and truly live the challenge the world has given us or wallow in self-pity saying that life is just too hard to deal with. In the first case, your life may not be easy at all – especially in the beginning – mainly due to the fact that you will have to come to terms with many situations, decisions and choices that you would have tried to avoid earlier or come to terms with much later in life. But the wealth of experience, the intensity of living one’s own life and greater trust and respect for oneself give a feeling of enjoyment in life that will lead to rejecting the easier and simpler way of life that comes so attractively. low price.

For example, many people hope that if they work hard enough on themselves, the way others treat them will change, so they start to ‘radiate differently’ or feel better about themselves or something. In some mild cases, this can actually happen. But, more often they won’t. This in itself is a challenge for us, as well as an opportunity, to face others through communicating our feelings and all the fears that come with it through taking these scarier and riskier choices.

My personal experience shows that this very often happens when I firmly decide to overcome my specific inhibitions and tell the other person what I have been putting off for a long time, often the other person really spontaneously starts to behave differently and there is no need for further confrontation. I must emphasize that this happens only when I truly and strongly decide to take that risk. However, in most situations, especially in the case of long-term and important relationships, this is not enough and very likely and very often you will have to invest a lot of yourself, expose your deepest and most illogical needs and beliefs and risk misunderstandings and conflicts. It is the process through which we grow the fastest as human beings and create closeness, understanding and love for ourselves and others.

There is no technique we can use that is a magic wand and a shield against life’s challenges. Techniques such as Soulwork Systemic Coaching can help me solve emotional and mental barriers, achieve inner experiences, a sense of trust, motivation as well as awareness of one’s own possibilities… but building new habits and actively working to achieve goals can only be done from the depth of our being. . More and more I feel how important concrete action in the outer world is in completing any technique used in the process of self-development.

Without it, we will never really know if we have changed or not or if we are actually just thinking about changing.

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